How to Regain Independence in a Relationship

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Be Be direct..

Be honest with yourself about how codependent you want to be. Signs of too much codependence can include fears of abandonment, an obsessive need for approval from your partner, and low self-esteem

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Spend more time alone

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Being able to spend time alone helps you feel more independent. It also gives you time to relax and connect with yourself

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Do separate social activities

his gives you time to switch yourself off from relationship mode. Go out for dinner with friends once a week without your partner. Or, meet up with friends from work for happy hour on Fridays before you go see your significant other

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Maintain personal projects

Do something you love that’s only for you. Personal projects can be hobbies, learning a new skill, or launching an entrepreneurial pursuit.

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Having your own goals to work towards is crucial to being your own person. These could be financial, fitness, educational, professional, or travel goals

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Set personal goals

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Prioritize your needs.

It’s easy to overlook yourself when you’re in a serious relationship. Personal needs can be mental, physical, emotional, social, and spiritual. Identify your needs and find ways to meet them independently of your partner

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Practice being assertive

Develop your ability to tell your partner what you want or don’t want. The next time your partner asks you to tag along for an errand or a social activity that you don’t feel like going to, practice saying no

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Keep your finances separate if you want

Financial independence can be a big part of feeling independent. If you’re serious about being in a long-term relationship with your partner, sit down and talk about finance with them

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Take a solo vacation

Traveling alone is a great way to connect with yourself. Instead of waiting for you and your partner’s schedules to align to take a vacation together, book one for yourself!

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Work with a therapist if you’re struggling

If you think you might have codependency issues, a therapist can help. Find a therapist who specializes in relationships. Talk with them about how you’re feeling and try to discover where your lack of independence is stemming from.

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